your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
