it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
