why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
i need some magic done to my vagina
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
