Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
