I'm lost and stupid without you.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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