Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
