PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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