Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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