I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize