guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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