This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
