Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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