READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
