I'm so fucking centered right now
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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