Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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