whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
