he thought i was a dude.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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