dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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