I bet he comes in French.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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