i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize