it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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