just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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