Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
