I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
