So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I'm passing your future prison.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize