I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
