If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
