Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
