you guys were way drunker than both of me
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
