Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
