Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
