A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I currently don't understand fingers.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
