dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
