I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize