Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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