Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
