is your mom at the bar?
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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