I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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