He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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