just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
