After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
