omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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