And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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