p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
