He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
