ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
