It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
