i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
