Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It's blow job season.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
