I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
