I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
